There were two – well, one and a bit – more pages after I did my last capture. The first page consisted largely of some entertaining banter between members about the relative merits of displaying fabric on plus-sized mannequins or the Eiffel Tower, who had actually seen the Eiffel Tower and where (‘on my cousins desk, it’s a light-up model’ etc), the need or otherwise to see certain things in order to believe them, and similar remarks. It was actually much funnier than it sounds written down like this, especially when interspersed with MadelineL’s increasingly-bizarre posts! I’m sure it was totally baffling to anyone who hadn’t read the entire thread in its original form, though! There were also a couple of posts addressed by members to MadelineL, expressing their general disgust at her behaviour on the thread.
She made some very odd responses indeed and continued editing and re-editing her earlier posts in a random fashion so that member’s responses started to read very strangely in places. Remember that cut and paste quotes are your friend in this sort of incident!
Then suddenly, someone who wanted to quote the thread’s opening post in response to a newcomer’s comment, posted that MadelineL had replaced the entire thing with a generic ‘apology’, and members started asking why. She seemed to get angry and her responses got more and more confused and confusing especially when she was asked why she was unable to own up to her own mistakes and needed to cover them up – which made the entire thread meaningless.
A member (I wonder who !) who’d been capturing the pages posted a copy of the original initial post in answer to the newcomer’s comment, and shortly after that, MadelineL started replacing all her posts in their entirety, with the same generic ‘apology’ thus –
Dear PR members,
I regret any misunderstandings the posts and replies, and clarifications may have made. My only intention was to find corporate sponsors who are inclusive of all people. I thank you for helping me to understand that the real issue should be that all people would like to be included and not have categorisations
I regret making this thread and I take back all of the things I said previously. I tried to clarify my words, and now I see that clarifying and replying was not the most helpful thing to do. I hope you can understand that it has been a learning process for me as a new member of the PR team. In the future, I will try my best to not bring up sensitive topics or topics.
and in addition posted individual apologies to a few members.
I particularly remember the ones to crazygrad and esseesee; they were so staggeringly, almost unbelievably, insincere that they were insulting. Both crazygrad and esseesee responded with what I can only describe as a combination of amazed disbelief and constructive vitriol, with comments about sneaking and snivelling, leopards and their spots, and refusal to learn.
Then the mod appeared at last and locked the thread.
After a while – quite a while – a rather lukewarm apology appeared from Deepika/Deleteka , the owner of sewing.patternreview.com, accompanied by a couple of feeble excuses, and after a day or so the entire thread was quietly disappeared, just like people who ask awkward questions in dictatorships.
What I find especially interesting in this is the way MadelineL’s generic ‘apology’ was expressed. At first glance it does indeed look like an apology, but if you read it again, you quickly see that it is not an apology at all, but a deliberate attempt to deflect blame away from the writer and onto others who had nothing whatsoever to do with the offensive statements in question. There is definite effort made to avoid accepting any personal responsibility for anything, and a refusal, or at least an unwillingness expressed, to actually learn and grow. Thus-
I regret any misunderstandings the posts and replies, and clarifications may have made. You misunderstood the posts, replies and clarifications. Not my fault.
I regret making this thread … because it showed me up for what I am.
…and I take back all of the things I said previously. So I’ll delete or edit all my posts, then no-one will ever be able to point the finger at me, and it’s you lot who’ll appear unreasonable, tetchy and argumentative with no context or follow-through to your posts. Yeah! I win!
I tried to clarify my words, and now I see that clarifying and replying was not the most helpful thing to do I tried to wriggle out of it, but you lot didn’t want to let me so it’s all your fault. Again. Not mine.
I hope you can understand that it has been a learning process for me as a new member of the PR team. I’m new so it’s not my fault. Again.
In the future, I will try my best to not bring up sensitive topics or topics. None of it was my fault and I’m going to make sure none of you fatso losers tries to drop me in it again. As I have no intention of changing how I approach and communicate with you lot – why should I, none of it was my fault – I won’t even pretend to try. Just put up, shut up and pay up – I still want my wages.
Oh dear, MadelineL. You clearly need a job where you won’t have to learn to communicate in a non-offensive, non-confrontational way.
So, that’s the end of this sorry, stupid saga. I’m sure it won’t be the last one on PR though.